it's been a while...

whoa...it's been quite a while since i posted an entry here of what has happened to my life... for almost three weeks, i've had myself busy working... working.. and just working... hehehe... not only to drive my mind away from thinking of a-not-so good-past.. but also preparing for my regularization at work.. yep.. u're right! i'm goin' to be regularized next week! after a year and so working for 3 call centers (including the one im at now..) mareregularize din ako! yipeeeee... hehehe... excited na din ako cuz this has alos been one of my reasons(kunwari) kaya di ko inaayos papers ko to leave for... still not sure where... hehe... just last week, my sister's asking me again why i'm not applying for a US visa yet...told her to give me a hundred bucks so i could... hehe.. im not sure if im ready to gamble on a hundred bucks cuz applying for a US visa is really like gambling... it's 99.9% luck and the rest? i really dont know.. hehe... and i'm not really into going abroad to wok and stay there for good... if i have the chance and the choice, i will go abroad just to visit my relatives... or maybe purely pleasure... hehe... ayun na nga... tsaka sayang naman yung pagkaregular ko sa work kung aalis kagad ako... laki pa ng tiwala saken ng mga superiors ko saken... hehehe... (pabibo!) hahaha...

hmmm... i was thinkin right before i write this entry, bakit parang walang kwenta buhay or should i say bakit walang kulay buhay ko pag wala ako lovelife??? hmmm... ganun ba talaga? or it's by choice... actually, alam ko naman sagot eh.. hehe... di ko lang alam kung ba't unconsciously eh di ko maenjoy ang pagiging single... haaaay... but anyway... at least i'm moving on na... (i'd like to think so... hehe..) yun na yung konting fun ko ngayun... goin out on friendly dates... hehe... ayun...

tapos last weekend pala, umuwi ako ng batangas... grabe... almost two months ako di umuwi... i missed my family... my nephews and nieces... my sisters... all of' em... and i could feel they missed me more... hehe... ayun... mejo nakapagrelax ako ng konti when i went home to batangas... sabi nga nung teammate ko sa work on my first shift after week's off, ok daw ung aura at itsura ko after my off... hehe... feeling ko din... kase all i did in batangas was to eat and sleep, and eat and sleep... hehehe... not to mention, eat and sleep... hahaha...

this coming off, im planning to go to pampanga... hmmm.. why??? secret na muna... baka maudlot pa... hehe... basta... =) im also planning to go out with my friends... two weeks na din ata kame di nagkikita at tagal na din ako di nakakasama sa mga gimiks nila...

o.. till here na muna...i've shared enuf... i think...

almost my mom.... =)

FLASHBACK!!! mga pics namin sa fontana...

from top: ang gwapong may-ari ng blog na ito!; Grand, kuya pong, nanay dyan and ate jaz; roschelle, dyan and me(with gin pomelo, hehe); AM namin, si momi RI at si daddy bry ang kanyang hubby; ate jazz, dyan and cheng; me and puccalicious; jim and dyan; randoy and dyan; me and nanay dyan; my Liebert CRC family (ate jaz, aileen, nanay dyan, yaya vangie, grand, cheng, kuya pong, at ako...) with Jim at the back...

Rafael. You're most like the ArchAngel of Healing.
You want people to shape up, and you nag. But
you mean well, and you're well loved despite
it. Or because of it. You bring the donuts
even as you tell people to eat more veggies.


Which ArchAngel are you most like?
brought to you by Quizilla

badtrip...

bakit ganon.. nagpopost ako... di ako makapagpost... kainis... haaaaayyyyyy....

You scored as Cyclops. Cyclops is the team leader of the X-Men, and a skilled one at that. He loves Jean Grey very much. He's a strict and sometimes uptight leader, but he believes in his cause and he knows what he's fighting for... Peace between Mutants and Humans. Powers: Optic blasts Cyclops 60% Colossus 55% Gambit 50% Wolverine 50% Beast 45% Iceman 45% Nightcrawler 40% Jean Grey 35% Rogue 30% Storm 20% Emma Frost 20% Most Comprehensive X-Men Personality Quiz created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Sexy. You're hot and sexy and I want to make out with you. Lol. K email me. in_the_depths_4ever@yahoo.com Sexy 60% Cute 30% Ugly 10% Are you ugly, cute, or sexy?! created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as Sexy. You're hot and sexy and I want to make out with you. Lol. K email me. in_the_depths_4ever@yahoo.com Sexy 60% Cute 30% Ugly 10% Are you ugly, cute, or sexy?! created with QuizFarm.com

wounded... again...

whoa... dunno how to start this entry... it's been a difficult day for me... errr i think difficult would really be an understatement... bakit kaya ganon? pag seryoso ako sa relationship palagi ako nasasaktan... as in... wala atang exception yan... masarap magloko pero nakakasawa din... kumbaga ung mga kasayahan na makukuha mo pag di ka seryoso eh pansamantala lang... while if you really try to be serious, ang sarap ng feeling ng nagmamahal... but in general, that's if mahal ka ng taong minamahal mo... as for me... nagmahal ako ng taong walang hiningi na kapalit... towards the start, kala ko mutual feelings namin sa isa't isa... i can still remember ung text nya telling me na ituloy ku lang yung ginagawa ko at makukuha ku na yung gustu ko... parang pangarap nalang yun ngayun... coz as days passed by, nagkaron kame ng maraming pagsubok... di pa man kame... andami ng humahadlang para maging kame... ung isip nya(i must admit, isa yun sa pinakamalaking problema at yun ang main cause ng pag-iyak-iyak ko lately...), masyado kase sya marami iniisip... there was a time na muntik na kame magpart ng ways namin "romantically" kaso i really tried my best and fought hard to save kung anu yung nasimulan namin at meron na kame... at that time, what we have was really shaken... pero i can say it made our bond stronger... lalu na on my part, mas lalu ko pina kita how much i love that person... as in... we were happy... a lot like love, mr. and mrs smith, batman begins, monster-in-law... four movies in one month... hehe, palagi kase kame nanunuod every rest day ko... we were happy(sa pagkakaalam ko), i can somehow feel naman na special ako for him... kahit every weekend, more often than not... may problema twing umuuwi sya... pero naayus everytime na bumabalik sya ng manila from alabang... every problem seemed to have always been straightened out... at last friday, t'was our first month as.... kahit na ano... di din namin alam... and that day was so special for me... sobra... and i thought that will be the good start for us dahil na rin sa isang binigay nya saken... alam nya na gustung-gustu ku yun and i was so happy that night.... i wished that night never ended... at kanina... nagtext sya saken at sabi, andami daw nya tinanong kung ano gagawin nya about "us..." and i said... kelangan ba nya talga ikonsulta sa iba kung anu nararamdaman nya??? at sabi nya... di pa din daw sya sure sa nararamdaman nya saken... baka nga daw di nya ako mahal and it would be unfair me if that would be the case... in short... parang gustu na nyang icut kung anu man meron kame at present... ok... wala ako magagawa kung un ang gustu nya... kase dalawa kame sa kung anu man relationship meron kame... i cant decide for the both us... at yun... tears started to fall... im walking along the sidewalk of ayala ave.. umiiyak... parang gago... nagtetext... saying , ok... kung yun desisyon nya... im letting go na.. kahit di naging "kame.." but that didnt mean na i gave up... di pa din nagbabago feelings ko para sa kanya... ganun ko pa din sya kamahal... but i must say... i can feel not only the pain but the restlessness... parang napapgod nako... di lang sa pagmamahal sa kanya but in general, sa pagmamahal... there's nothin left of me... naibigay ko na lahat sa kanila... im not sure kung may sukli o kapalit, kung meron man, di siguro sapat to keep me goin... at sabi ko sa kanya... if the time comes that i really would give up on us, susubukan ko muna ipahinga ung puso ko... kumbaga sa boxing o wrestling, bugbog na bugbog na yung part na pinakamasakit sayu... kumbaga, sugat na nga... nasugatan na naman... dunno when i can move on... although im not yet planning to... mahal ko sya at kagaya ng sabi ko... di pako naggive up on us kahit sya, give up na... i may have let go of what we have, but i didnt give up... im not ready yet... i'll wait for the right time... my doors are still open para sa kanya... dahil mahal ko sya... and that should be reason enough...

about love...

someone special sent me this message this morning...

To love is to accept the verdict without the bitterness, without regret, without a smidgen of a doubt. When you love you will get hurt. Accept it as a fact It's part of the pain-pleasure phenomenon. You cannot love wisely because loving doesn't involve thinking. Thinking results in a conscious choice. But you cannot choose whom to fall in love with. The trick is to wait for the right time...

Hmmm... even before... naniniwala nako dito... hehe... totoo naman e... sabi ko nga sa last post ko di ba... emotions and reasons don't mix... ayun,,, thanks for sending this one... =)